What it is
Water-based lube is compatible with every condom and toy, washes off easily but can dry out. Silicone-based lube lasts much longer and works well for anal play and in water, but it can damage silicone toys. Oil-based products are slick and long lasting but break down latex condoms. Hybrid lubes mix water and silicone for a creamy texture with longer glide.
Personal lubricant, or lube, reduces friction during sex, masturbation and toy play. It makes many activities more comfortable, lowers the risk of small tears and helps condoms stay intact. Lubricants come in four main types, and choosing the right one depends on your body, your toys and whether you use condoms. Using lube is normal and is not a sign that anything is wrong.
What it involves
- Applying lube to the body, to a toy, to fingers or to the outside of a condom before and during play.
- Reapplying whenever things start to feel dry or sticky, rather than pushing on.
- Matching the type of lube to the activity, the toy material and the barrier being used.
- Using thicker lubes for anal play, since the anus does not produce its own lubrication.
How to start
Start with a simple water-based lube, which works with every toy and every condom.
Patch test a new lube on your inner arm or a small area first if you have sensitive skin.
Use more than you think you need, and keep the bottle within reach so reapplying is easy.
Read the ingredient list and choose products without fragrance, flavor or warming agents at first.
Going further
- Try a silicone-based lube for longer sessions, anal play or play in the shower, with toys made of glass, steel or hard plastic.
- Test silicone lube on a hidden spot of a silicone toy first, since some toys become sticky or damaged.
- Explore thicker gels for anal play and thinner liquids for massage or hand play.
- Learn which lubes your body tolerates best, especially if you are prone to yeast or bacterial infections.
Safety
- Never use oil-based lube, lotion or massage oil with latex or polyisoprene condoms, since oil weakens them.
- Avoid lubes containing nonoxynol-9, a spermicide that irritates tissue and can increase the risk of infection.
- Avoid numbing lubes for anal play, because pain is an important warning sign.
- Very concentrated lubes can draw water out of tissue and cause irritation, so milder formulas are often better for anal and vaginal use.
Consent
- Talk openly about using lube, and make it clear that it is a normal part of comfortable sex.
- Ask about allergies or sensitivities before introducing a new product to a partner.
- Agree that anyone can pause to add lube at any time without it breaking the mood.
- Respect a partner's preference for a particular type, since bodies react differently.
Warnings
- Burning, itching, rash or unusual discharge after using a lube is a reason to stop and try a different product.
- Some ingredients, such as glycerin or sugars, may encourage yeast infections in people prone to them.
- Oil-based products can be hard to wash out and may be linked to vaginal infections.
- Silicone lube on floors and bathtubs makes them very slippery, so wipe spills right away.
Good to know
- Saliva dries quickly and is not a good substitute for lube, especially for anal play.
- Nitrile and polyurethane condoms are compatible with oil-based lube, unlike latex and polyisoprene.
- Store lube at room temperature, close the lid after use and replace it when it passes its expiry date.
- Lube is useful at every age and stage of life, including during menopause and with medications that reduce natural lubrication.