Tools
Relationship agreements
A written agreement helps you talk through roles, limits, safewords and aftercare before you play, and gives you something to come back to later.
What a relationship agreement is
A relationship agreement (often called a BDSM contract) is a written summary of what partners have negotiated: the dynamic they want, the activities they are curious about, their hard limits, their safewords and what each person needs afterwards. Writing it down slows the conversation down, makes sure nothing important is skipped and shows where you agree and where you still need to talk.
A communication tool, not a legal contract
An agreement is not legally binding and cannot oblige anyone to do anything. Consent is given freely, can be withdrawn at any time and always overrides what is written down. No agreement can make an activity legal that the law forbids, and both partners must be adults.
How to use an agreement
Talk first
Pick a calm moment outside of a scene. Go through the template together and say what you want, what you are unsure about and what is off the table.
Make it yours
Delete what does not fit, add what is missing and use your own words. A short agreement you both understand beats a long one nobody reads.
Agree on safety
Settle safewords, hard limits, check-ins and aftercare before anything else. These parts are never optional.
Review it regularly
Revisit the agreement every few months or whenever something changes. Either of you can ask to renegotiate at any time.
Templates for common dynamics
Each template suggests activities, rules and topics that often come up in that dynamic. Treat them as conversation prompts, not as a standard you have to meet.
12 templates
- Sadist / masochistSadist/Masochist ContractContract for sadomasochistic relationships with detailed pain scales, injury protocols, medical considerations, and intensity boundaries.10 activities · 10 rulesView template
- Dominant / submissiveDominant/Submissive ContractComprehensive contract for traditional D/s dynamics with clear power exchange boundaries, protocols, and expectations.10 activities · 10 rulesView template
- Rigger / rope bunnyRigger/Rope Bunny ContractSpecialized contract for rope bondage dynamics covering rope safety, suspension protocols, escape plans, and circulation checks.8 activities · 10 rulesView template
- Master / slave18+Master/Slave ContractAdvanced total power exchange contract with extensive protocols, ownership terms, and service expectations.10 activities · 12 rulesView template
- Daddy Dom / little (DD/lg)18+Daddy Dom/little Contract (DD/lg)Caregiver/little dynamic contract covering rules, care protocols, age regression boundaries, and nurturing expectations.12 activities · 12 rulesView template
- Mommy Domme / little boy (MD/lb)18+Mommy Domme/little Contract (MD/lb)Mommy Domme/little boy dynamic with nurturing dominance, care protocols, and age play boundaries.12 activities · 12 rulesView template
- Switch partnershipSwitch Partnership ContractFlexible contract for partners who switch roles, including role negotiation, switching schedules, and boundaries.10 activities · 12 rulesView template
- Primal (hunter / prey)18+Primal Play ContractContract for primal dynamics including hunter/prey, rough play, and instinct-driven interactions.12 activities · 12 rulesView template
- Owner / petPet Play ContractContract for pet/owner dynamics covering training, care, protocols, and pet persona expectations.12 activities · 12 rulesView template
- Dominant / service submissive18+Service Submissive ContractContract focused on service-oriented submission including tasks, protocols, and service expectations.10 activities · 12 rulesView template
- Brat / tamerBrat/Tamer ContractContract for brat/tamer dynamics with clear boundaries for playful defiance and correction methods.11 activities · 12 rulesView template
- PolyamorousPolyamorous BDSM ContractMulti-partner BDSM contract covering hierarchies, boundaries, scheduling, and consent across multiple connections.9 activities · 13 rulesView template
Prefer to start from scratch?
The builder walks you through seven short steps: your details, your interests, your partner's interests, safewords, limits, aftercare and rules. You can print the result, download it as a Word file or save it to your account and sign it together.
Common questions
Is a BDSM contract legally binding?
No. It is a personal agreement between consenting adults that documents your conversation. It cannot be enforced, and consent can be withdrawn at any time, whatever the document says.
Do we need an agreement to play safely?
No, but many people find that writing things down helps. The essential part is the conversation: limits, safewords, check-ins and aftercare. An agreement simply makes sure none of these are forgotten.
How often should we update it?
Review it every three to six months and whenever your relationship, health or interests change. Treat each version as a snapshot of what you both want right now.
Can my partner and I sign it online?
Yes. With a free account you can save an agreement, link it to your partner and both sign it digitally. Each change creates a new version, so you can always see what you agreed on before.
Educational content. Not medical, legal or psychological advice.